Something very interesting happened when I had my conversion at 21 years old. I changed completely in how I viewed my life and what was good for me. This affected my behavior in a good way, however, it also lead me to overthink the morality of my actions which caused intense scrupulosity.
A simple definition of scrupulosity in faith based terms is: overthinking your spiritual life to cause you to doubt your salvation and goodness. Someone who is scrupulous judges themselves and others too harshly thinking that he or she is not holy enough unless they are doing x, y, or z. Furthermore, sometimes even that is not good enough because they can find some fault in how they carried something out or some other reason why they faulted.
Essentially, I went from thinking that I was free to do whatever I wanted and everything was permissible (before my conversion), to heightening my self control and thinking that only a very short list of actions were permissible (after). At first glance, increasing my self control might seem like a good thing, however, my brain would not leave it at that. I overdid it. In my attempt to root out evil in my life, I started to think that I was not holy unless I followed all sorts of impractical rules and lived according to a very narrow margin.
The problem with this kind of thinking in regards to spirituality is that it takes away from God. God is almighty, and good, and merciful. Furthermore, He loves you unconditionally and longs to spend eternity with you. A scrupulous heart takes away these attributes from God and remakes Him into a cruel master instead of a merciful Father and a loving Savior.
Furthermore, when someone lives their life scrupulously, they are acting as if they are the ones who bring about their own redemption, that they are saving themselves. Yes, we are called to “work out our salvation with fear and trembling”, as St. Paul says in Philippians 2:12, but we must remember that the Lord is helping us do this. We can depend entirely on Him and His grace, which is what makes our salvation possible, to be holy and walk with Him on our journey through this life to the next. In fact, the very next thing St. Paul says after Philippians 2:12, in Philippians 2:13, is “ For it is God who is at work in you, enabling you both to desire and to act for his chosen purpose.”
So do not be afraid my friend! God is with you and will help you in every moment. In fact He will even help you if you struggle with scrupulosity. He is good and wants what is best for you even more than you do.
Keeping this all in mind will be powerful for you. Plus, I have 10 more ways that you can use to work on and overcome your scrupulosity. Check them out below and let us know which ones you find to be the most helpful. You can share with us at info@zenithministries.com.
1. Be patient with yourself.
No one is perfect so it would be quite unfair to expect this of yourself. This is your first time living your life, so it is completely sane and normal to be patient with yourself when you mess up or don’t do things perfectly. The important this thing is that you keep trying!
2. Get a Spiritual Director
Having someone else to walk with you as you seek to grow closer to Jesus is powerful. It is also helpful to get out of your head and share your thoughts as you battle scrupulosity. A spiritual director can let you know objectively when you are doing too much or too little so you do not have doubt or get anxious about how your spiritual life is going.
3. Train Your Brain to focus more on what is going well.
If you are constantly focusing on what you are doing wrong or poorly, you will develop this into a habit, which will make it easier or more likely for you to only notice the negative in your spiritual life. Train your brain to notice what is going well by forcing yourself to list 5 to 10 things that are positive in your spiritual life at least once a day.
4. Forgive yourself
It is possible to hold a grudge even against yourself. This restricts so much good in your spiritual life as it can cut you off from hearing the Lord and giving Him full permission to work in your life. It also does not feel good to feel negative toward yourself. Saying “In the Name of Jesus, I forgive myself for______” will unlock this and allow you to let go of the baggage that could be weighing you down.
5. Learn to Love Yourself
Similar to number 4, loving yourself is effective in overcoming scrupulosity. When you see yourself as something that is good and lovable, you will allow for more imperfection and have less disgust with yourself when you do not meet the overly strict standards that scrupulosity can create. You will see yourself as a soul that needs to be nourished instead of a beast that needs to be viciously treated to grow in holiness.
6. Ask God what He Thinks About What You Are Scrupulous About.
Dialoguing with the Lord is incredible. It will help you in so many aspects of your Faith walk, but especially in terms of overcoming your scrupulosity. Anytime you encounter the negativity of this poor mindset, ask the Lord what He thinks. If you have cultivated the beauty of hearing His voice, He will guide you through this and lead you to the freedom of a life that lives out His plans authentically and without fear.
7. Limit The Amount Of Time You Think About The Thing You Are Scrupulous About Each Day To 30 Minutes.
If you struggle with overthinking and overcoming your scruples, you can take more control by limiting how often you allow yourself to think about them. Set the time to a 30 minute to one hour period in which you are allowed to consider these things. Any time outside of your allotted window in which you begin to overthink and have scruples, you simply say to yourself that it not the time to think of these things.
8. Better Understand God the Father
Like we talked about earlier, when you struggle with scrupulosity, you are viewing God the Father as a cruel master instead of the merciful and loving Father that He truly is. You must renew your understanding of the Lord. Read the story of the prodigal son in Luke 15 and think about how God the Father is just like the Father in the story. Also, invite God in prayer to show you the Loving Father that He truly is.
9. Know Your True Identity
Like number 8, scrupulosity is also a sign that you are misunderstanding who you are. Your true identity is not that you are an abandoned orphan who needs to earn their food and shelter at the orphanage by behaving a certain way. No, you are a beloved child of God simply through your existence. You are incredibly loved and nothing will ever change that. Yes, you should seek to do good in your life, but this should be done from the understanding that you are already chosen by God and not in order to be chosen by God. Once again, read the prodigal son and this time view yourself as the wayward son being totally embraced by the father after doing what he did. Also, this time ask God to show you who you truly are in His eyes.
10. Practice living in the Presence of God
God is always with you. Remembering this and thinking about Him will have a positive impact on you. It is not easy to express exactly what the transformation will look like, but know that good things come from living your life while remembering that you are in the presence of God. Practice this by regularly reminding yourself that God is with you. Then spend time thinking about His presence and ask Him to fill you with it.
Each of these can have a tremendous impact on your Spiritual Life and help you overcome scrupulosity. I invite you to start by trying one or two at a time and then adding more when you think it is appropriate. The more of these you implement in your life, the greater the impact.
If you are interested in receiving more one on one help with overcoming scrupulosity or you feel like you could benefit from receiving powerful healing prayer, we can help. We have been witnessing tremendous healing taking place for those we work with in our mentorship service. Learn more at https://zenithministries.com/mentorship/
